Create a Learning Environment that Fosters Self-Discovery- Part 3

Curiosity is the core of self-discovery. When leaders ask “why,” it opens the door for reflection, increased awareness, and greater insight. When leaders combine curiosity with compassion and commitment to help their team grow, it is a game changer. People are always more willing to grow when they know that their leader has their back. They are willing to try new things, reflect on what they learned, adapt, and keep trying again until they excel. 

Five leadership skills are the foundation for fostering curiousity.

• Stop look and listen.
• Move toward instead of away from.
• Observe instead of judge.
• Think liberating and limiting instead of good/bad positive/negative.
• Ask instead of tell.

The ability to master the last of these skills – ask instead of tell – is the difference between average leaders and excellent leaders. It is the secret sauce for building the behaviors of growth in your team.

Asking Creates Understanding and Ownership

Almost everything you “tell” will get better results if you turn it into a question. It’s the ultimate superpower in The Auxin Leadership System. Simple example: A team member’s performance is below expectations. What’s your first instinct? The usual pattern is to analyze the situation, determine what needs to be done, and tell the person what they need to do differently – make more calls, be more efficient, use a different CRM system, prioritize better. You might sprinkle a question or two in the discussion, but you primarily tell the person what they need to do, rather than helping them discover what they need to do. The person usually responds with nodding their head, saying something like, “I think that will help,” and then having a spurt of energy. Their activity may increase for a while (and maybe their results), but in the long term they simply become obedient - plateauing at how you have defined expectations.

Asking gets a different result. It quickly moves through the excuses and gets to the root cause. Take the example above: A team member’s performance is below expectations. If you begin by asking the question, “Help me understand why?” the person is forced to stop, think, and then respond. The initial response could be an excuse or the truth. You don’t really know for sure. If you respond to their comment with a “why or how” question, the person is forced to think deeper. Let’s say, for example, that the person’s day was busy, and they did not have time to complete an important assignment. Respond with another question, “If you knew that the day would be busy, what could you have done differently to create more time to focus on your goals?” This forces the person to think about what was in their control to create the desired outcome. There is an old continuous improvement tool called the “5 whys” that can be incredibly useful in this situation. It simply says that when you ask “why” 5 times you will usually get to the root cause of the problem. Once you discover the root cause, the solution usually becomes obvious.

In a fast-moving world, here’s why asking instead of telling creates greater impact. You want your people driving growth. You want them thinking, anticipating, and reacting in ways that create higher performance and growth. The most effective strategy is to start with a question and ask at least two more questions that move from “what” to “why” to “how.” Whatever the result, ask why. If the results were great, ask why. This forces the person to think through their actions, reinforcing liberating thinking and action in their mind and body. If performance was down, ask why without judgement. This forces the person to think through what they did and discover better options moving forward. Whatever the current outcome, asking questions creates greater understanding, better problem-solving, and better decision-making in the future. When you tell people the answer, you are the problem solver, not them. Telling may create short term action, but it also creates long term plateauing at how you define success. Telling creates a compliant team of doers that are less emotionally invested in helping you succeed. Asking, on the other hand, creates thinking and analysis. With support, it creates problem solvers and great decision-makers who can adapt to changing times.

Below are two useful self-discovery tools to add to your leadership toolbox: The Ultimate Self-Discovery Process and Conversation Anticipation.

The Ultimate Self-Discovery Process

There are two ways to “ask instead of tell.” You can ask closed ended questions or open-ended questions. Closed-ended questions require a “Yes or No” answer. They usually begin with “Do you, can you, or will you?” Closed ended question are only useful when you need someone to commit to a specific course of action. Open-ended questions require an explanation. Lightening Bob Ludkie mastered the open-ended question. Learning environments that fosters self-discovery, and higher performance start with open-ended questions that begin with “what, why, or how.”

A few years ago, we designed what we refer to as the Ultimate Self-Discovery Process. It is like the Swiss Army Knife^R of questions. You can use it in every interaction with your team to understand, reinforce, and support growth.

Identify & Ask, Mirror, Explore, Reinforce/Refocus

Here’s how to use The Ultimate Self-Discovery Multi-Tool.

Identify & Ask: When you see something you want to explore, identify the situation and ask a clarifying question. “Ken, you seemed uncomfortable in the meeting with the CEO. Did I read that correctly? Help me understand what was going on.” “Susan, the weekly report was late for the third week in a row, help me understand what’s happening.” You are not accusing or judging. You are simply stating what happened (or what appeared to happen) and want clarification. Asking for clarification opened the door for conversation. When a team member is successful at something, use the same tool to reinforce liberating thinking and action. “Carol, you did a great job meeting the end-of-month deadlines. Help me understand what you did to be successful this month.” 

Mirror:   The person will respond to your question. When they respond, repeat back to them what you heard to ensure that you heard correctly what they said. “So, you…” If you heard them correctly, they will affirm that you heard correctly. If you missed something they can clarify it.

Explore: Use open ended questions to better understand what happened and why it happened. “Your strategy was effective. Tell me why you used that strategy.”

Reinforce/Refocus: If the person did something that you want to affirm and support, affirm their thought process and action steps. “So, you reorganized your calendar to provide more time to complete the report and review it before you sent it to me. Good strategy.” You can also explore how they would apply the same thought process in a different situation.

If the person’s actions did not create the desired outcome, explore what they didn’t understand. Asking questions like, “Do you understand why I need the report by noon on Friday? If so, tell me what you understand,” or “What do you need to do differently in the future to meeting the deadline with confidence?” These inquiring questions will help the person build a better plan to meet the goal. The ultimate goal is to help them become a better problem-solver. The Ultimate Self-Discovery Process can help you create a more engaged, equipped, and empowered team.

As a leader always remember this:

In the 21^st century you need a team of problem solvers, not a team of compliant doers of tasks.